Pure Church

It's the Christmas season. Time for all that tinsel and joy, lights and carols, and... yes, scrooge. It's that time of year where so many wonder "where is Jesus?" and others see Him in every tradition or celebration. It can be difficult to craft good traditions as a new family, or to salvage other customs in a Christ-honoring way. There's precept and there's preference. And everybody, I trust, wants to honor Christ in a meaningful way.

Thinking about some of these things recently prompted me to dig out a post from December 2007. Thought I'd re-post it for those with any interest. Merry Christmas!

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Down with Santa Claus

Over the past couple weeks, several people have asked me what I think about children "celebrating" Santa Claus during the Christmas season. Usually the questioner is a parent of a young child with some angst about whether or not they are doing the right thing this time of year.

As is the case with many cultural issues, advocates line up on both sides of the issue. Those who are for the typical Christmas celebrations replete with the big jolly fella and his companions, generally offer the following reasons:

1. "There is nothing wrong with Santa Claus. It's harmless."
2. "Children need myth and story like this to exercise or develop their imaginations."
3. "Children should have fun during the season. They should have something to look forward to."
4. "It's part of our tradition (whether family tradition, cultural tradition, etc.)."

Well, for the almost ten years we have been parents, my wife and I have been on the opposing side of this question. We have endured through years of pressure from our parents--the children's grandparents--to "let them have a Christmas," meaning a tree, Santa Claus, many gifts and the like. Sometimes it was personal--"You had a Christmas! Why can't the baby have a Christmas?" And other times it was solidly defiant. "Well, I don't care what you say. I'm gonna give that baby a Christmas."

Nevertheless, we weathered the grandparent wrath and we have managed to have quiet, reflective Christmas celebrations without ol' Saint Nick. And here is why I think Christmas without Santa is a better way to go for Christians.

1. Imagination. The argument that children need the myths of Christmas in order to fuel their imagination has generally baffled me on two counts. First, they don't seem to need the aid of Father Christmas any other time of the year. Their imaginations are active as they play with dolls, dig in the dirt, imagine themselves to be kings of the realm. For 11 months of the year, the imagination organ works just fine. So, it's curious to me that they should need an aid in the 12th month. But second, and more important, the argument from imagination seems to me to be an admission that Christian parents may have lost the ability to stand in awe of the most wondrous events in all of history. And if the parents have lost that awe, it's little wonder that they don't expect their children to stand amazed at the coming of Christ. I mean Christmas is the time we celebrate the Infinite Creator God, sending His Eternal Son down from eternity into space and time. God entered His creation, indeed, took nine months residence in the womb of a virgin. One fully God and fully man was born, clothed in the likeness of sinful man, lived a perfect life in obedience to the Father, died a scandalous death in love for sinners, and rose from the grave in glory! Imagine that. This is what our children's minds should be fired with. And it's all true! In the end, there is nothing as inspiring as the truth about Jesus!

2. Having Fun. A fair number of parents have, almost in panic, expressed concern that should there be no Santa Claus their children would not have fun at Christmas. And children, they say, need to have fun at Christmas. Generally, the "fun" in mind is the passing pleasure of visiting crowded malls, waiting in long lines to sit on Santa's knees, waiting days and weeks until Christmas morn, and gleefully opening gifts. Only to be bored with it all within a couple days, sometimes hours, after waking to the festival of paper shredding. No doubt Christmas is fun. Even as parents, we get great delight from seeing our children's faces as they rummage through the boxes and gifts. But the implication here is that Christmas without the trappings, Christmas exclusively focused on the birth of the Savior, is boring. The argument implies that there is no anticipation associated with awaiting the celebration of Jesus' incarnation.


But that's surely false where children are instructed in the true meaning of the celebration. My wife and I once had the painful experience of preparing our daughters for "Jesus' birthday." My oldest girl, about four at the time, was greatly looking forward to it. The year before we'd had a small neighborhood gathering for the children where we read the Christmas story, baked a cake, discussed the gospel in celebration of Jesus' birth. She'd had great fun and looked forward to it the following year. The year came around and we decided to spend it with a grandparent, replete with the customary trappings and focus. The day came. So, too, did family and visitors. Presents were opened. Parades paraded. A great dinner eaten. Children played and adults talked. The day came and went. The following morning our daughter asked, "So, when do we celebrate Jesus' birthday? What day is Christmas this year?" The look of deep disappointment--a look that communicated she felt robbed and ashamed--washed over her face as we told her in our most sympathetic voices, "Sweetie, yesterday was Christmas." For our daughter, the day had no fun equal to that of focusing on the Savior and celebrating His birth and mission to save sinners. That was our goal, and we'd abandon it. We felt like wearing bags with "World's Last Spiritual Christian Parents" written on them. Christmas is fun--great fun in the truth--when our children are taught its meaning.

3. "There's nothing wrong with Santa Claus, etc. It's part of our tradition." Sometimes I hear this and think, "My, you doth protest too much." There's a palpable admission in the strenuous way this defense is offered. When I've had this conversation with folks who've taken this defense, it sometimes seems they are troubled by what is perhaps missing in their celebration, but they're perhaps seeking to comfort themselves. And the statement is sometimes more about the parent's desires than it is about the needs of children.

But is there anything "wrong" with a Santa-inspired Christmas? There are possibly three things wrong. When we lived in the Washington, D.C. area, there was a lawsuit over Christmas/holiday decorations filed against a local city council. The filers of the suit specifically targeted the town's use of Santa Claus in the city parade and in other decorations as religious symbolism that violated church and state. The folks filing the suit won. What's wrong with that picture?

What's wrong with that picture is that the non-Christians in the suit, and probably many others, thought Santa Claus was somehow connected with the Christian faith. Christ Jesus and the Christian gospel were shrouded in mythology. What may be wrong with Christian participation in holiday myth is that the Truth is lost beneath pagan ideas or light clichés. It's hard to know "He's the reason for the season" if the folks who purportedly follow Him don't publicly and joyously celebrate Him during the season. So, the first possible wrong is that we may miss gospel opportunities with our neighbors and friends.

The second possible wrong is we may indeed be cultural syncretists, blending our faith in the Lord with the celebration of myth and the material festivals of our day. We may raise children who come to find both Santa Claus and Jesus Christ incredulous. For after all, children "grow up." And if "growing up" involves the putting away of childish things, and we've somehow lumped Christ in with childish things, then it's not surprising that some become "too grown up" or "too intelligent" or "too scientific" to really consider the Lord of glory. Turning the hearts of our children to a myth when the glorious Lord is available to them may be to eventually turn their hearts to worldliness in its 1,000 flavors. That's what is wrong with good ol' St. Nick.

A third thing that may be wrong, in many ways associated with the issue above. Is it right and what effects might we expect from raising our children to participate long-term in a lie? I've been calling Santa Claus a "myth." But the other word we could use is "lie" or "deception." We sometimes put this in the "little white lie" category, the harmless tall tale. But, it seems to me that there people are sometimes so commitment to this "myth" or "lie" that it's anything but the little white variety. And though children may grow up beyond such fibs (though not without first experiencing the mild trauma and pain of finding out he is not real), what do we teach them about the nature of truth, commitment to and pursuit of it, and ethical behavior with Santa Claus? Is the not so subtle message, "It's okay to believe a lie when it favors or advantages you in some way." Or, "It's okay to tell a lie if we think it will make someone happy." If our children grow up and apply that reasoning to dating, the workplace, marriages, or most any other area of life the results will be painful and sometimes disastrous. If we do the Santa Claus thing with our children, do we take the time to "back fill" their understanding of the nature of truth and morality? Do we honestly think our children at four, five, etc. are able to comprehend moral nuance? Any parent who has told their child to do one thing, only later to be called on the carpet by that child's black-and-white observation of the parent's own failure in that area, knows that nuance is not something children do well. The thing is black or white, true or false. And that should be used to parenting advantage when it comes to raising our children in the fear and admonition of the Lord.

Our children have grown up to have a wonderful, imagination-engaging, fun Christmas without Santa Claus. And scores of children whose parents make Santa Claus a part of their Christmas celebration have also grown up to have wonderful memories of Christmas and to serve the Lord faithfully. And there are tons of children in both camps that have not had great celebrations.

I'm not arguing a dogmatic causality here. I'm simply asking the question, "Why include Santa Claus at all?" Is the imagined upside of following the culture here worth what we think it's worth? And are our justifications helping us to point our children to Christ or masking the reality that we may be pointing our children away from Him? Personally, I doubt Santa Claus is worth it, and pointing our kids away from Jesus at Christmas may be the worst form of child neglect I can imagine.

From The National Post:

The U.S. Supreme Court has agreed to hear an appeal that sets anti-discrimination principles against religious freedom.

The case is part of a continuing battle by a student group, the Christian Legal Society (CLS), to defend its rights of religious liberty and freedom of association.

However, the University of California's Hastings College of the Law refuses to recognize the CLS because of what it calls the group's discriminatory membership requirements.

The CLS says all students are welcome to participate in its activities, but leadership and voting members must sign a Statement of Faith affirming they adhere to traditional Christian beliefs.

This will no doubt have implications for evangelical college groups operating on campus. Already there have been prominent conflicts between evangelical groups at a major Catholic University (here and here).

But it might be a good thing. Seems the Christian faith flourishes most when it does not have the sanction of governmental bodies.

So if you were on the bench of the U.S. Supreme Court, which principle do you think should prevail?

“Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself.” Now you love yourself suitably when you love God better than yourself. What, then, you aim at in yourself you must aim at in your neighbor, namely, that he may love God with a perfect affection. For you do not love him as yourself, unless you try to draw him to that good which you are yourself pursuing. For this is the one good which has room for all to pursue it along with thee. From this precept proceed the duties of human society....

Augustine, Of the Morals of the Catholic (Universal) Church, chapter 26

A sister in the church sent this to me; thought I'd share.

At least it makes you say crazy stuff. Three cases in point:

Rush Limbaugh:



What?! Why is this guy still employed? Why is anybody still listening to him? What non-sense!

Sen. Harry Reid

Okay... let's switch political aisles for a moment just to show that "race"-induced insanity strikes all political varieties. Check the comments from Sen. Reid re: health care reform and those who oppose it.



Really?! Not passing health care reform is akin to opposing abolition, women's suffrage, and Civil Rights legislation?! Wow. Health care reform is either very, very important, or two very sad things just happened. One: Sen. Reid used some very "race"-freighted comparisons to essentially demonize his opponents. Two: He just trivialized some rather huge social and political issues with an unwarranted comparison. I think the first is unkind. I resent the second.

As I've written elsewhere, the current "let's take our issue and make it the new slavery or the new Civil Rights" is both offensive to many and ineffective. The abortion=slavery, Civil Rights=gay rights analogies should be abandoned, if for no other reason than the sometimes tacit and other times explicit racial freight they carry. It's not helping us.

Tiger Woods and Racial Reconciliation?

Finally, Tiger Woods. If you've not read C.J.'s post, you should go there now. It's must reading. I've been pretty disinterested in all the Tiger mess. I'm surprised people are surprised, and I wonder if all the shock and horror are simply more respectable guises for our voyeurism.

Anyway, I was caught by one of Challies' A La Carte items (don't you love that feature!). In it, he quotes a section from an article at American Thinker. I don't really know this blog or this person, so this isn't aimed at anyone in particular. I just couldn't understand how this sentence about Tiger could be true: "...he was our first living embodiment of the collective hope for racial reconciliation."

The man defines himself as so "racially" or ethnically "other" that it's nearly impossible to see him as reconciling anything, or embodying any hopes for reconciliation. What exactly is a "Calabanasian," Tiger's self-designation? He has a right to that, and I don't begrudge him one bit. So, let's not make him "black" all of a sudden (an imposition and a false assumption from our one-drop rule past). But it's a huge stretch of the imagination to consider him "our first living embodiment of the collective hope for reconciliation." Heck. I'm not even sure there is such a "collective hope." Seems most are pretty comfortable with marginal interaction masking deep stratification.

Anyway... that's my mental health post for the week. Let's check the craziness at least through the New Year.

Well, first, the good news. Our brother Al Mohler reviews an interesting piece from Jennifer Senior in New York magazine entitled "The Abortion Distortion--Just How Pro-Choice Is America Really?" Mohler writes:

In “The Abortion Distortion — Just How Pro-choice is America, Really?,” writer Jennifer Senior offers an incredibly insightful and important essay on the moral status of abortion in the American mind. Senior is clearly writing to a New York readership — expected to be overwhelmingly pro-choice and settled in a posture of abortion advocacy. Given the passage of the so-called “Stupak amendment” to the health-care reform bill adopted by the House of Representatives, many in the pro-choice movement responded with amazement that a pro-life minority has been able to muster such support. Jennifer Senior posed the most awkward question for her readers: Is America really pro-choice

The good news from this piece is that Americans are significantly less pro-choice than a small, aging minority would have us believe. Senior's work goes back to the 1970s documenting that Roe was significantly out-of-step with public opinion and abortion as a practice continues to be. May it not only be out of step but out of existence in our lifetime.

Now the bad news. Or, at least the cute bad news. Turns out most children are unrepentant sociopaths. Mockingbird links to a very funny piece from The Onion. An excerpt:

MINNEAPOLIS—A study published Monday in The Journal Of Child Psychology And Psychiatry has concluded that an estimated 98 percent of children under the age of 10 are remorseless sociopaths with little regard for anything other than their own egocentric interests and pleasures.

According to Dr. Leonard Mateo, a developmental psychologist at the University of Minnesota and lead author of the study, most adults are completely unaware that they could be living among callous monsters who would remorselessly exploit them to obtain something as insignificant as an ice cream cone or a new toy.



"The most disturbing facet of this ubiquitous childhood disorder is an utter lack of empathy," Mateo said. "These people—if you can even call them that—deliberately violate every social norm without ever pausing to consider how their selfish behavior might affect others. It's as if they have no concept of anyone but themselves."

"The depths of depravity that these tiny psychopaths are capable of reaching are really quite chilling," Mateo added.

Read the whole thing here.

Related Posts:
Two Year Olds Are Sneaky Little Sinners
The Joys of Talking with Little Kids

Yesterday I linked to a video from Mark Dever commending The Trellis and the Vine as "the best book on the nature of church ministry" that he has read. You can see the video and a long list of endorsements here.

Today, Westminster announced a 50% off sale on the book until 3pm Easter December 10th. If you've been thinking about getting copies of this book for yourself, your pastoral staff and leadership, or others, now is the time to buy a stack!

C. J. Mahaney - Recap from T4G 2008 from Together for the Gospel (T4G) on Vimeo.

Lig Duncan - Recap from T4G 2008 from Together for the Gospel (T4G) on Vimeo.

John Piper - Recap from T4G 2008 from Together for the Gospel (T4G) on Vimeo.

Thabiti Anyabwile - Recap from T4G 2008 from Together for the Gospel (T4G) on Vimeo.

Jesus. Love. Joy. Gospel. Reward. Love. Did you hear that running through these videos? That's what I love about T4G! Can't wait for them to release the rest of these brief recaps and to gather in Louisville in April! Find out more and register here.

I just saw a rooster vertically jump and flap about 9 feet into a tree. Did you know roosters could jump? That's a better vertical than Kobe!

"Solomon brought Pharaoh's daughter up from the city of David to the house that he had built for her, for he said, 'My wife shall not live in the house of David king of Israel, for the places to which the ark of the Lord has come are holy'." (2 Chron. 8:11)

Solomon has just completed building the temple of the Lord, dedicating it with joy and prayer (chp. 7). He begins a period of wider building once the temple and his house are build. He takes cities from rival people, builds walls and gates, establishes fortified supply cities throughout, and places the men of Israel in key leadership positions (8:1-10). He offers burnt offerings, observes the special feasts commanded in the Law, and organizes temple worship in keeping with David's commands, finishing all the work before him (8:12-18).

But in the middle of all this accomplishment, verse 11 sticks out like a giant aching thumb. The king has an Egyptian wife; he has married outside of Israel. Apparently, he recognizes something of the inconsistency. He decides that an unholy wife shouldn't live in the places made holy by the ark's presence.


But is this repentance? Is this turning from the act of disobedience? Of a sort, perhaps? But it's hardly warfare against sin. It would seem to be the mandatory motions of religious sensibility, which demand a certain decorum but neglects deeper realities.

We don't wish to beat up on Solomon as though inconsistency belongs to him alone. How often are we tempted to coddle our sins in more secret places, out of sight of the Most Holy, rather than repent of it altogether and casting it out of our lives completely? How tempting it is to keep our sins safely tucked away for future use rather than hating and killing our sin. We're not too unlike Solomon whenever we make political alliances with our sins instead of abandoning ourselves more completely to God.

Even if all around us is success, we may then be laying the grounds for our own defeat. Visible success is no measure of genuine godliness. Outward results may simply mask inward failure. And the seed of our failure is planted in the secret, safe grounds of far away houses that the godly among us cannot observe. We all have places in us where we may hide and store things, places no one has access to unless we open it to them. Those are the most dangerous places of all. Those are the places most needing light. the things we place there are the things most needing discovery and death because they're ultimately the most dangerous and damning.

Oh, Lord, keep me from delighting in secret sin. Keep me from building private residences for disobedience. Make me ruthless with all that opposes your holy word and your glorious Name. Do this with all you people, O Lord, our Sovereign King and Redeemer.

Deepak Reju at Church Matters offered this very helpful post:

One of the new practices on our elder board is that we take 30 minutes at the beginning of every meeting to cross-examine one of the brothers. You hear a lot of expected questions (How is your prayer life and quiet time? How is your parenting?), but you also a wide range of unexpected questions. One question that I heard recently that I thought would be good for other pastors to consider:

"If the devil were to ruin your ministry, what area of your life would he pursue?"

And a follow-up question: "Whatever area of life is vulnerable, what are you doing right now to protect against the devil's work?"

Brothers, don't let the devil get a foothold in your life. Pray and Fight. There is much work left to be done.

Tim Challies gives his top 9 books of 2009 and his overall favorite. Good stuff on the list.

What were your favorites?

I remember a couple months back sitting in Mark Dever's study as he was reading the manuscript for a new book, The Trellis and the Vine. I can only think of a couple books that provoked so much enthusiasm from Mark. He doesn't normally do superlatives, as he alludes to in this video. Here's his plug for "the best book on the nature of church ministry," The Trellis and the Vine.



Here are some of the endorsements for the book from the Matthias Media website:


Commendations for 'The Trellis and the Vine'

What Col and Tony have described here is exactly what I've been trying to do in my own life and in our congregation for years. According to this book, Christians are to be disciple-making disciples and pastors are to be trainers. Superb! This book sets out a crucial shift that is needed in the mindset of many pastors. The authors have carefully listened to the Bible. And they've worked on this book. The result is a book that is well-written and well- illustrated, but even more, a book that is full of biblical wisdom and practical advice. This is the best book I've read on the nature of church ministry.
Mark Dever, Senior Pastor, Capitol Hill Baptist Church, Washington DC, USA

I am thrilled that this book has been written! What God has done in Sydney over the last few decades is nothing less than supernatural?-and we in South Africa have long been the beneficiaries. The model of ministry presented in this book has left an indelible mark on my own ministry and been of inestimable value to the denomination I belong to. The mindsets put forth in this book have not only impacted many of our churches, but have changed our regional thinking, planning and strategy. We are indebted to Col and Tony for putting into words a culture of ministry that is biblically pragmatic, deeply theological and, above all, passionately concerned for the lost.
Grant Retief, Rector, Christ Church, Umhlanga, South Africa

This is a simple, beautiful book that I plan to have every pastor and elder at The Village Church read. It quietly and calmly beckons us back to biblical, hands-on shepherding and is a book desperately needed among large churches in the West.
Matt Chandler, Lead Pastor, The Village Church, Dallas, Texas, USA

Gospel ministry is about God's glory and God's people! This excellent book takes us right to the heart of authentic Christian ministry. Any church will benefit hugely from studying and acting on it.
William Taylor, Rector, St Helen's Bishopsgate, London, UK

For over twenty years, I have seen the ideas in this excellent book developed, tested and improved in the active ministry of the gospel. They are the kind of counter-intuitive ideas that, once encountered and embraced, make you wonder why you did not always think this way.
Phillip D. Jensen, Dean, St Andrew's Cathedral, Sydney, Australia

If I could put only one new book into the hands of every person preparing for ministry today, The Trellis and the Vine would be it. Marshall and Payne leverage decades of experience in one of the world's great cities with the hope of stimulating gospel growth around the globe. This book will also refresh every pastor who has ever asked, "What in the world am I supposed to be doing?" I came away energized, strengthened in my core calling and better prepared to bear fruit for Christ. In fact, it's so good that I want every leader and pastoral intern in our church to read it!
David Helm, Pastor, Holy Trinity Church, Chicago, Illinois, USA

It is impossible to read The Trellis and the Vine without having your cherished ministry assumptions profoundly challenged. In your hands is a God-glorifying, scripturally-soaked re-evaluation of Christian ministry. It will untangle the anomaly of being a Christian without a radical missionary heart. It will identify the plethora of ministry structures that owe more to cultural pragmatism than the Bible. And above all, it will inspire us to serve the church of God, which he obtained with his own blood.
Richard Chin, National Director, Australian Fellowship of Evangelical Students, Sydney, Australia

God makes ministers in the midst of his church. It is in the context of the faithful local church that ministers are best taught, shaped and equipped. The Trellis and the Vine is a superb guide to preparing pastors and ministers for Christ's church. It comes from a ministry so deeply committed to the recovery of biblical truth and the cause of the gospel. The wisdom in this little book is invaluable. My advice: Keep a good stack on hand at all times, and put this book to good use.
R. Albert Mohler, Jr., President, The Southern Baptist Theological Seminary, Louisville, Kentucky, USA

This book empathizes with the confusion that many pastors have when they allow themselves to lose focus on Jesus' goal for ministry, namely, to make disciple-makers. But it doesn't leave the pastor there in the cloud of desperation; it gives him the courage to trust in his Master's strategy again. And take courage: Jesus' strategy was able to reach countries as far as my own.
Cristóbal Cerón, General Coordinator, Gimnasio (MTS), Chile

There is no need greater (in the happy resurgence of robust, gospel-centred churches in the English-speaking world) than for us to think biblically and wisely about how we live and minister together in our congregations. All manner of folk are offering us their opinions as to how we ought to do this in this reforming era (in which some, if not many, rightly see the weaknesses of the ministry and methodology of the last fifty years, but whose prescriptions for remedy fall short of the standards of Scripture and wisdom). Yes, let's rethink what we are to do and be together as the church, but let's do it biblically, and with the wisdom of biblical discernment and pastoral experience. So I announce with joy that I have new conversation partners as I am asking myself, under the authority of God and Scripture, questions about the structure and ministry of my congregation: "Why are we doing what we are doing? Are we focusing on the right things? Is the gospel central? Are we making disciples? Has 'administry' trumped ministry? Is our corporate life and mission biblically shaped?" And more. As I ask these things, I am so deeply helped and heartened and humbled and corrected by the fidelity and wisdom of Colin Marshall and Tony Payne's profound little book that I can't but commend it to you.
Ligon Duncan, Senior Minister, First Presbyterian Church, Jackson, Mississippi, USA (Past Moderator, General Assembly, Presbyterian Church in America)

This book is the perfect example of good theology driving practice. Col's many years of experience in recruiting and training pastors shines through on every page. Scattered with helpful personal examples, this book is a crucial read for people seeking to grapple with the biblical principles of gospel growth.
Paul Dale, Senior Pastor, Church by the Bridge, Sydney, Australia

The Trellis and the Vine is a must-read for every minister of the gospel. The principles in this book will revolutionize the way many of us do ministry, and help us to encourage and grow the next generation of gospel workers. So often we are caught up in building and maintaining our 'trellis' (ministry structure), and we forget that Christian ministry is all about the 'vine'?-the people. Thank you for this clear, Bible-centred approach to the most important task in the world.
Ainsley Poulos, Equip Women Ministries, Sydney, Australia

The Trellis and the Vine is a dangerous book to read. It demolishes precious and much-loved idols like these: "If we just have the right vision and mission statement, they will come ... If we just have the right vibe, they will come ... If we just have the right speaker ... the right band ... the right building ..." The Trellis and the Vine reminds the church that Jesus says the exact opposite. Jesus tells us to be great commission-aries and to "Go ... make disciples of all nations". The Trellis and the Vine is the best book I have read about mobilizing all Christians to be great commission-aries. It will turn church-shoppers into servants, consumers into producers, and disciples into disciple-makers.
Ben Pfahlert Director, Ministry Training Strategy (MTS), Sydney, Australia

This stimulating new book on biblical training will challenge some cherished methodologies. Tony and Col, though, are able to unsettle and critique with sympathy and understanding. Their observations are always judicious and never judgemental. Every page pulsates with a desire for the growth of the gospel and the maturing of the church. This is not the work of quick-fix pragmatists or armchair theologians, but the product of thirty years of effective ministry practice and reflection. It deserves to be widely read and discussed by all who are serious about every-person ministry in the church. It will be a set text at BCV!
Michael Raiter Principal, The Bible College of Victoria, Australia

with a little help from Daryl Coley, "To Live Is Christ."



Titus, my 3-year-old son, walked in and asked, "What's that song?"

He had more interest than usual as he walked over to my laptop screen. Smiling he said, "That sounds like Jonah!" (of Veggie Tales' Jonah fame).



Guess different people prepare to different stuff!

If you've been following the posts on "The Costs of Following Jesus" (here and here), you've read about a fictional man named "Brad," a new convert to the faith, father of three with a live-in girlfriend of 13 years. Obviously, Brad has some things to think through if he is going to faithfully follow the Lord. We've been discussing our views.

Today, Carson shared an email post written to a young church planter on this very issue. HT to one of the commenters here. This is very thoughtful, and I hope you'll read it.

I loved this cartoon found at an atheist site.




It's interesting to consider how an atheist and a Christian might read these remarks with both agreement and disagreement. I agree, for example that the genetic "cousinage" of all humanity means we're staggeringly more similar than different. I agree that recognizing that common identity should make a fundamental change in self- and group-understanding.

Yet, I disagree with the implied premise that religious affiliation should not "trump" other markers of identity. There is only one human "race," yet there are two spiritual races--the race of Adam and the race of Christ. At the judgment seat of Christ, our biological commonality will be infinitely less important than whether we have been made new through faith and union with Christ in his death, burial and resurrection to share in His glory as a redeemed humanity. Our thoughts about identity may condemn us before Christ, but they could never save us apart from Christ.

Terrible inference. Love the cartoon.

JT posts a great video conversation between Bob Kauflin and David Powlison on the intersection between counseling and worship.

What do you think? I think the kid has a future.

Thoughtful post/question from iMonk:

I believe in grace, but I wonder what what must happen in my life before I have the appetite for the goodness, sweetness and joy of the Gospel? I am not talking about the joy of straight theological lines or the manipulated joy of the big show at the local megachurch. I am talking about the joy of the Gospel that lives in the hearts of the poor, the dispossessed, the disowned and the disenfranchised of the world. What will move me away from all the misplaced happiness I pursue and toward a thirst for living water and the one who is the ever-ending fountain.

A couple days back, we began a new series of posts on "The Cost of Following Jesus". Thanks to all those who shared wisdom and thoughts regarding our scenario from yesterday: Brad, a new convert with a long-time live-in girlfriend and three children depending on his income. The reason I'm thankful for the comments and the reason I'm enjoying this series is that such situations are real human dramas for so many people and so many churches. Learning to respond biblically and with an understanding of the "costs" that will be paid to follow Jesus is a big part of shepherding well in these cases.

I don't pretend to have the "air tight" answers. So, my responses aren't meant to "settle" all open questions and be some kind of "advice from on high." I'm a fellow elder looking to be faithful and to think out loud about some hypothetical situations before I have to work through some real ones. And I'm hoping this exercise is a means of grace to us all. So a few thoughts.

The Costs Brad Will Pay

Obviously, Brad will need to figure out how to live faithfully before the Lord. And that means at least two things: no more sexual immorality, but also continuing to faithfully care for his children who need both his presence and his financial support.

Does he leave the family? If so, does he take the children with him? Does he leave the children and continue providing financial support?

Does he break off the 13-year relationship with Jill? Or, does he marry her? Since she is not a Christian, can he marry her (1 Cor. 7:39)? If he doesn't marry her, are we helping him to defraud her (1 Thess. 4)?


A father is more than a paycheck, so we don't want to weaken or harm the family as we help this brand new Christian discover how to follow Jesus. And Jesus' glory and our love for Him trumps all other loves, so we don't want to leave Brad putting Jill and the children before the Lord. Nor is the love and commitment shared over decades between a man and a woman a small thing to trifle with. All these things are risks associated with helping Brad follow the Lord and bear the costs.

And there are risks to the church and to Jill and the children. How this is handled communicates a lot either accurately or inaccurately about the nature of God's grace and Christian love. Jill and the children are not believers. We desire the family to see the gospel worked out in a winsome way that commends holiness as beautiful. Responding poorly will hurt one or more people in this family.

So what to do?

An Approach

What would be the strengths or weaknesses of the following approach? What would have merit and would should be re-thought? With all of this, I'm talking a couple weeks, not a few months or years.

With Brad:

1. Encourage perseverance and sanctification. Avoid giving assurances based on unbiblical criteria. Instead, exhort the brother in those marks of the Christian life we see described in the Bible: love for the brethren, obedience as love to Jesus, sanctification, and so on. Help Brad to see the work of Christ in the Christian's life as extraordinary and extensive rather than small and trivial. That includes understanding that Jesus is Lord of his sex life as well. There are no intimacies over which the Lord does not say, "Mine." In short, work to give Brad a solid biblical view of what a Christian is.

2. Study with him a book like Ephesians or 1 Thessalonians. This is a practical way to approach #1 above. The books are short enough to cover in a couple weeks, and rich enough theologically and practically that a good picture of the Christian life emerges. Ephesians has the advantage of giving an exalted, Christ-centered view of marriage, something Brad and his girlfriend need. I Thessalonians has the advantage of addressing sanctification and sexual purity directly (chap. 4) and of pointing to the coming of Christ. Both give helpful instruction on the church and its role. As you study, let the Bible ask questions of Brad. Rather than launch a lot of imperatives at Brad, let the Lord's Spirit in His gentle and effective way use the word to address Brad. Ask good questions about the text, and prompt Brad to bring the text to his life.

3. Develop a plan with Brad to pursue marriage quickly. There may be a lot of work that needs to be put into this one. Brad and Jill don't esteem marriage. They have fears about it working. They're comfortable with their current commitments and arrangements. And Jill, at least, doesn't think their relationship is sinful. So, there's a lot of patient teaching that must be done here. There's a lot of exploration and shepherding that needs to be offered in order to help them make wise decisions. But, the aim would be to have a plan for getting Brad and Jill through their issues and to the marriage altar in good shape. Repentance for Brad looks like marrying Jill, which would be strengthening his commitment to her and the children. But the plan should also include some definite thoughts about leaving the relationship if Jill is unwilling to live with Brad as a believer or if she remains opposed to marriage.

4. Baptize Brad after steps 1-3. Teach the brother with all patience. Affirm his decision to follow the Lord and deepen that decision with instruction, rather than questioning the commitment and undermining his faith. Brad's mind needs to be renewed (Rom. 12:1-2) about a lot of things, but that doesn't happen over night. We all entered the baptismal waters in need of some continuing sanctification. Baptism pictures our union with Christ in His death and resurrection, not our glorification and perfection. Build up to the baptism in such a way that the baptism marks a decisive break with the world, but also a decisive beginning with Christ and the church. Avoid making "complete sanctification" the entry fee for the baptismal waters, but protect baptism by counseling the brother thoroughly.


With the Church

All of this, of course, depends on helping the congregation see this as precisely the kinds of opportunities we want to be helpful in, rather than the kinds of things we want to fix quickly, squash, or pretend doesn't happen. A couple of thoughts:

1. With Brad's support and testimony, before baptism and membership, explain Brad's situation at members' meeting, and share the highlights of the plan to help him live faithfully before the Lord. Call on the congregation to bear the brother's burden (Gal. 6:1-2) and to practically help wherever possible. Ask the congregation to faithfully pray for Brad, Jill and the children. Encourage the congregation to bring Brad into the family under the special care of the church. Have Brad make definite statements about the sin of cohabiting and fornication. Be clear, too, about the expectations for Brad should the counseling and efforts toward marriage not work. And be clear about the congregation's responsibility in loving correction should Brad refuse to listen to the church in the counseling and efforts at growing in grace.

2. Be an ally in helping to share the faith with his family. Encourage the church to involve Brad, Jill and the children in hospitality, church activities, and so on. Make the relationship with Brad about partnering in the gospel to win his family, rather than about separating Brad from the family as enemies. Love Jill and the kids in any practical way possible. Help her find better work, if that's a need. Babysit so they can have time to talk through things or attend relationship counseling. Work to make them think that Brad really has entered into this wide and caring family that cares for them all and wants the best for them all. A couple sisters from the church should be asked to develop a relationship with Jill with sharing the gospel and being a general source of support a main priority.

Conclusion

Well, those are my thoughts right now. Let me eat lunch and I may want to change some or all of this. I'm thinking through some of these things wanting to be clear but patient and sensitive as well. I don't know that these comments get the balance correct. So, what do you think? Help me out here.